I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
