we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
