there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
