you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
