Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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