the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Houston, we have a blender
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Randomize
