So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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