How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize