Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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