turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
