I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
