is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?