I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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