i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
don't judge my taste in strippers
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
