If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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