mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize