Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
We are two peas in an std pod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize