Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
