last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Randomize