Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize