We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Dicks are not precious.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
