gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize