He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
