brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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