turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
