i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
