Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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