I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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