Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
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I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
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You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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