Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
