actually, I'm a sock model
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
