I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
