Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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