I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
