yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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