Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
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His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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