Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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