so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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