That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
