"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
you made out with another girl for some wings
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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