oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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