i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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