even my farts smell like vagina
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
