One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
