nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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