It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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