lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
