My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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