yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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