she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
